Rick Couch/Staff Writer

It never fails. Every year we decide to change our lives forever and every year we fail. What I am referring to are those pesky New Years resolutions. We have all had them and we have all broken them.

They spring from every aspect from self-improvement to giving everything to charity and moving to a shack in Montana (This one usually ends with jail time). For whatever reason, we just don’t have the will power to stand by them.

One of the most popular of all New Year’s resolutions is to lose weight or get into better shape. The gorging that takes place the previous week usually inspires this. After a good round of Christmas eats many forget what their toes look like and wish to get reacquanted. This is when we get full of fire to dedicate ourselves to pumping up and gaining that material body. A quick call to the good people at Bow Flex or the local gym and we are ready. Sure, you made the same commitment last year, but this year is going to be different.

Well, bad news Skippy, no its not. Your new Bow Flex will likely be used to keep the weight bench you got last year company in the garage. The sprit is willing, but the flesh is fat and far more content to sit on the couch and watch a couple of hours of Seinfeld.

Getting into shape leads into another New Years resolution. This particular vow has been spoken behind empty hopes more than any other. That vow is “I am going to find that special someone this year.” They say there is someone for everyone and each year we become master detectives in that desperate search. Come Jan. 1 we are quite the social butterflies hitting every potential hot spot we can find. This is the year. This time we are ready to settle down. Wrong again! By mid February it is back to the couch for a little more Seinfeld. I wonder what Elaine is doing these days?

Next comes the king of all New Years resolutions. This year millions will vow to quit smoking. I put heavy emphasis on the word vow because that is as far as many will get. You know it is bad for you so there is no reason to continue doing it right? People die everyday of cancer and heart disease because of cigarettes. The only logical thing to do is to put them away. It sounds really good when said aloud, but come that first stressful day at the office, the first parent teacher conference or the first nicotine fit people are scrambling for their lighters. It’s always the same. This will be the last one. That last one usually carries them through the rest of the year.

Another major effort taken on when the calendar rolls over is to become more organized. This one disappears faster than any other resolution. It is really only a ghost resolution as it rarely ever even gets put into practice. Normally, soon after this resolution is made we fumble to find where we put the pen and notepad so the vow can be put into writing. When we can’t remember where either has been placed the vow is over and it’s back to Seinfeld. Kramer isn’t the least bit organized and he has done pretty well, right?

This year I encourage you to stand by your New Year’s resolutions. At least try to show a little self-discipline. I have never been able to do this myself, but this year I plan to kick my effort up a notch on whatever challenge I issue myself between now and Saturday. Good luck and stay strong.